Jesus said, “Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and don’t do the things I say? I will show you what someone is like who comes to me, hears my words, and acts on them: He is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. When the flood came, the river crashed against that house and couldn’t shake it, because it was well built. But the one who hears and does not act is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. The river crashed against it, and immediately it collapsed. And the destruction of that house was great.” Luke 6:46-49
Decade after decade, popular songs reflect the disappointment and heartbreak of a dying romance:
“Mystery is a thing not easily captured, once deceased not easily exhumed. Now that it’s done, now that the endless wait is over, how do we make love stay?”1
How do you keep the music playing? How do you make it last? How do you keep the song from fading too fast? How do you lose yourself to someone and never lose your way? How do you not run out of new things to say? Since we know we’re always changing, how can it be the same? Tell me how, year after year, you’re sure your heart will fall apart each time you hear her name?”2
Obviously, most Americans have not found the answer to these questions. In addition to the many marriages whose failure ends in divorce, there are countless other marriages whose failure ends in unpleasant coexistence, whether accompanied by ceaseless quarrels or bitter silence. I’m continually heartbroken as I see families torn apart, not only by marriages that end in divorce, but also by marriages that are such a bitter, sad existence.
Many people, old and young, know all too well that when a marriage breaks up, it isn’t just the couple left with wounds, too often children are involved, as well as grandparents and other loved ones. Divorce has torn apart the very fabric of our society, and these other people don’t know what to do with this new set of circumstances.
This month’s devotionals, excerpts from our book When Two Become One, are not intended to guarantee that those who read them will never get a divorce. I wish I could do that. They are intended to offer scriptural principles, which if put into practice, can not only help you to avoid divorce, but can help your marriage become the kind of joyful relationship God intends. Salvation is not merely intended to ensure our survival; salvation is given in order that we might have life and have it more abundantly.
This doesn’t mean we’re assured of a ride with no bumps. When one of our boys was a preschooler, he went on his first roller coaster ride. He didn’t express fear when it was over, but he did say with some exasperation, “It’s too bumpy.” Many people feel their marriage is like that roller coaster ride, lots of ups and downs, bumps and noise and then suddenly it’s over. God doesn’t guarantee there will be no bumps, but marriage doesn’t have to be a harrowing roller coaster ride.
God wants your marriage relationship to be joyful. He wants it to be a witness to his loving and exciting plan for his creation. In fact, marriage is designed by God in order to represent the relationship between Christ and the church. Certainly, we know God intends for the relationship of Christ and the church to be beautiful. God intends for the relationship of husband and wife to be a picture reflecting this beautiful relationship.
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