…For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations, whose architect and builder is God.
Hebrews 11:10
A Christian is clearly warned not to enter into marriage with a non-Christian.
2 Corinthians 6:14 states a principle that is true not only of marriage but of other relationships in life: “Be not yoked together with unbelievers.” If you are already married to a non-Christian, scripture speaks to your situation as well. The point I want to make is that even uniting two Christians does not guarantee a biblical marriage. Each partner must ask honestly, “Is Jesus my best friend? Am I currently growing closer to him?”
You may be asking yourself, “What can I do now; I’m already married? This is a discussion on laying the foundation, and I’m already married.”
When I lived on Cape Cod, I saw something many times I hadn’t seen before and haven’t seen since. I saw old houses being raised up and a new foundation being put in under the house. It’s a lot harder to do it that way. There are many risks involved. But sometimes it’s the only hope of restoring an old house on the verge of being condemned.
If you have a choice, it’s smart to build a solid foundation the first time. If you’ve already got your house built, and you find out the foundation is not good, it is possible to go back and put in a good foundation. It takes time and a lot of work. It can be quite complicated, but thank God, it can be done. You may have to dig out a whole lot of dirt, but it can be done.
What can you do to make Jesus Christ the center of your relationship with each other? Make sure he’s the center of your life personally. It’s impossible to make Jesus Christ the center of your other relationships if he isn’t the center of your life. It can’t be done. He can’t be the Lord of your marriage if he’s not the Lord of your life. You can’t have a Christian home unless Jesus is Lord of that home. He must be your Lord.
He must be Lord of everything, everywhere you go. Discipline yourselves to pray individually, pray together, and if children come along, pray as a family. You also need to be praying for each other when you’re apart. You have to work at praying together. Even preacher’s families have to work at this. It must be made a priority or it won’t happen. Likewise, you need to read the Bible individually and talk about it as you apply it to your lives daily. You must seek out fellowship with other believers.
If you haven’t been obeying Jesus as the Lord of your life personally and the Lord of your marriage, don’t give up. It takes time and work, but it is possible and important to obey him now and put in that solid foundation.
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